Dating Liberty

What do you write for the blog that has everything? Clearly this isn't a question that I had to consider when preparing this blog post. Seriously. Scroll down and see for yourself. A whole two posts?! But I'm a glass half-full kinda guy, so I like to think of it as a blank canvas. Or like a barren wasteland waiting to be fertilized by the stuff that comes out of my mind.

That last paragraph was basically my attempt at stalling because I don't know what to write.

*looks around the blog*

Well . . . maybe it's going to be "The Pursuit- Part 3."

*has a genius idea*

Hold up. Have you ever noticed how actually pursuing life at Liberty (kinda like the title of this blog) is similar to pursuing a girlfriend? No? Well it totally is!

Note to the female readership: I wish I knew how to make this post gender-neutral, but the only gender-neutral options for boyfriend and girlfriend are significant other and partner and mate, and those just sound weird.

The Infatuation Stage

When you first get to LU, everything seems wonderful. You hear students complain about the dining hall, and you think to yourself, "It's not that bad." Then you hear them call it the "Rot," and you get a little defensive: "If you were my lady, I'd never take you for granted like that."

The Dating Stage

But once you enter the dating stage, it's like the "Rot" is that special little pet name that you invented. And as a freshman, you and your friends will giggle every time you say it. But it's not obnoxious or immature; it's the giggle of one who is experiencing his first love. As things keep getting better, you start coming up with your own nicknames for different parts of campus. Instead of the Tilley Center, you simply call it "The Tilllllllll-AY!!!" And since the LaHaye Student Union is far too formal for young lovers, you know it best as "The LaHizzzzzz-AY!!!"

Note: If you are actually this bad at coming up with nicknames, you should avoid doing so with a real girlfriend.

The Settled In Stage

Eventually you become an upperclassman, and the excitement wears offs as you start to take things for granted. The time you once treasured together is still nice, but now you need your "me time," so you skip the occasional class and tell her, "I just don't feel like hanging out right now."

This is also the stage when you begin to see her flaws. Driving on campus used to seem so cute. Every trip was an exciting game of "Don't Kill the Clueless Pedestrian." But it's gotten old, and now you just wish you could drive a quarter of a mile in less than ten minutes.

The Break Up Stage

Breaking up is inevitable - you have to graduate sometime. By the time you've completed all the necessary work for your degree, you are more than ready to take a break. What other girl would expect you to spend $20,000+ in a nine month period. Datin' Liberty be expensive yo!

The Make Up Stage

This stage only exists if you can't find a job elsewhere after graduation. As you sit around your apartment that you can't afford as a poor, debt-laden college grad and fantasize about Ramen, which never seemed like a luxury before, you just wish it wasn't so dark. But now you have to pay the electric bill, so the lights stay off. You feel like you would give anything to get back the campus' awful fluorescent lights. So you contact HR to see if there are any job openings; you're ready to forgive Liberty, to take her back in your arms for a fresh start.

By Mike Wynn

Mike Wynn is a Resident Director for the Office of Student Leadership. He is also the star of The Mr Wynn Show. If you would like to contact Mike about this post, you can do so through his blog: http://themrwynnshow.blogspot.com.